--- Are the scriptures real truth? ---
God knows I don't know!
I hope to God the Bible is truth! I pray it's truth. I try and believe it's truth... But?
Written: 2026
No matter who proclaims otherwise, or how sincere they might be; what truth actually is is what we are all waiting to find out. Many or seemingly even most people believe we should eat drink and be merry for this life we are living is all there is; and tomorrow we die. (Isa 22:13; 1 Cor 15:32) Others, like me, have used their life to great value, or squandered it, believing there must be a prime cause of all we see; and what we see gives sound reason for hope that Creator must be good... (Heb 11:6) If there is a good Creator, the Bible is the only sensible explanation of Him. But, the simple truth is, no human actually knows.
Today, I suffered the trauma of an old and dear friend dying, someone I loved very much and had to witness her suffer and die. She loved life and shared my hope of living into eternity, as dear pals forever. She seemed to love to hear me speak about that hope. But today, she died. It was after an extended illness and she suffered a great deal. Even though she and I are/were old, I pray to live forever, and, I prayed for her to enjoy that with me. I prayed all through her ordeal and felt sometimes my prayers were answered. But in her finality [until her resurrection, assuming that hope is real], my prayers apparently weren't. In her last days, when she suffered so much, I prayed that if there was some reason God couldn't keep her alive, that He would ease her suffering. I couldn't feel her suffering, of course, but I saw no indication it was eased... I know the reasons He gives us in the Bible about how suffering and death is not his fault; and how He has a fix in place; but we have to wait until his fix is revealed. Today, I'm not really feeling it! Today, I feel angry, angry with Him... I do know many people will say, and I confess they might be right, such a statement means I am just wicked. The God I have fallen in love with and chosen to worship is good and loving and kind! Well, that's who I hope He is. And, that is who I have learned him to be from the Bible. Today, however, He doesn't feel that way. There was just no reason for my friend to suffer the way she did! There just wasn't! He claims he knows when a sparrow falls to the earth and the hairs on my head are all numbered. (Mat 10:29-31) Couldn't He have spared both me and my dear friend all this pain?
I still love יהוה, of course, as I have known him to be. Or, I am trying to. One problem for me in all this is I'm never quite sure how much of what I feel for Him is true love, and how much is just my hope for eternal life at is hand. Hoping for his blessings is certainly one reason I serve. Expecting His reward, however, is not bad... (Heb 11:6) I want to be able to say it's alright that He didn't give any indication of help, and that my friends suffering didn't matter. The simple truth is it does matter to me. It should matter. It should matter to Him! And, as I say, maybe it does... as I couldn't feel how much my friend suffered or how much relief she got. But, relief wasn't noticeable to me or anyone else until after she struggled her very best and hardest for her last breath. I hope what happened to her isn't all there is...
Trying to find some un-bad in this, I guess maybe if I am able to go on loving Him in spite of what is happening to me and the rest of this world, maybe that is what indicates there is something of value in me. I sure hope so. I hope I am able to go on loving him.
So, is the Bible the truth? What I know is it's the only game in town. If it isn't true, we are just all damned to what ever comes our way, with no hope. I do hope better, but we all wait to see... I keep trying to truly believe it's better, to be a person of faith. I guess we're all waiting to see that as well!
This doesn't change all the good I have said about our Creator on this website. I have only done my best to parrot what the Bible says, and, I do still try and have Bible truth as my hope. This pain is also been forced to become part of my hope and/or faith. Since I have tried to influence a lot of people, it would seem incompatible with truth not to make known what my true faith is, for good or for bad! Today... I'm just sorry and sad, trying to find some way to continue forward in expectation the God I have hoped in all my life actually is good and cares about us, like He claims He does! It's very scary to write this. I fear making Him angry and what that might bring. But, I don't know how not to. I feel I must serve Him out of love, not fear... Still, as I have done all my life, I once again do all I know to do: "Father, please help me!" (Mark 9:22-24 of 20-24) I hope continuing to appeal to him is sensible, but, the truth is too, there is just no where else to turn!
Updated: Wed, Mar 18, 2026
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